Zombies v. Vampires

Earlier this year, Time Magazine declared "Zombies the New Vampires" based on the ascendancy of flicks like Dead Snow, the upcoming Zombieland and books like "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies." And that's not even considering the realm of video games, where zombies have been dominating for years with the "Resident Evil" and "Left for Dead" series.

But Vampires wont die quietly (as anyone who has seen the finale of The Lost Boys knows). New vampy movies and tv series are being trotted out on a continual basis to rapturous adoration. There's of course the Twilight series with its dreamy sparkle vamps, True Blood on the tv with its human blood abstaining vamps, and a new bloodsucking flick, Thirst, from Korean auteur Park Chan-Wook.

The entertainment industry is responding to our demand for hungry undead monsters. But is the vampire camp growing soft?

I haven't yet gotten to see Thirst, which, considering Chan-Wook's other works, will probably be edgy and disturbing, but the majority of recent vampire flicks tend to lean pretty hard on the tender romancing while sacrificing the ghoulish, undead, will-eat-your-kittens-for-breakfast aspect of vampires that made them popular in the first place (Nosferatu, anyone? That dude was Not sexxy).

There have been a few exceptions, notably, 30 Days of Night, but it's beginning to seem that vampire culture is losing its dark soul.

Many of these "modern" vampires bend over backwards to avoid feeding on people. You know who would never think to do that? A zombie.

Zombies are reliable for ruthless, merciless destruction. You can't seduce a zombie. You can't convince it to eat a Big Mac instead of your face. You would never want a zombie to "change" you into one of them. Their monsterness is undeniable and repellent. It makes them fun to watch. It makes them even more fun to kill.

The vampire set is now overdue for a bloody swing back towards its more vicious roots; the genre's cool factor has been heavily depleted by its fuzzy figureheads. But until that swing happens, zombies will always be there, steadfast in their hunger; the monster that will never let you down.